I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
