just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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