Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Sext me about skeletons
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
