just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
