Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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