the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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