like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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