Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Just puked most of my soul out..
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
