Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
