well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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