So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
