I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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