He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize