you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
