Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
