do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
