She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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