Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize