writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
