my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Randomize
