You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
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