i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize