long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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