this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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