Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
