he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
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