Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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