I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
