I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
