2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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