Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
