There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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