so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
he thought i was a dude.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
