I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
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