First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Randomize
