man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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