The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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