I want to have your abortion
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
