highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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