its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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