Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
lol hangovers are for mortals.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
