If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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