Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
In America we eat man semen.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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