why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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