Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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