Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
