Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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