what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize