You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
