mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
