we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
